Funny jokes

Boss: Where were you born?
Sardar: In India….
Boss: which part?
Sardar: What ‘which part’? Whole body was born in India.

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Teacher: Which is the oldest animal in world?
Sardar: ZEBRA
Teacher: How?
Sardar: Bcoz it is Black & White.

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Judge: Tum apni limit cross kar rahe ho.
Lawyer: Kaun saala aisa kehta he? 

Judge: Tum ne muje sala bola?
Lawyer: Nahi My Lord, maine pucha KAUN 

SA LAW aisa kehta he?

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Servant to Maalik: Maalik, Ramu apko gadhe

Ke barabar bhi nahi samjhta.

Funny Ramu: Nahi maalik, yeh jhooth bol raha

hai, mein to samjhta hoon ji.

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Girlfriend: Kya shaadi k baad bi tum muje itna pyar karoge?
Funny Boyfriend: Kyon nahin? Mujhe to shadi-shuda girls bohot Pasand hain.

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Pappu Pinko ko pasand karta hay, aur Pinki Pappu k bhai ko… Jab k Pappu k bhai ko Pinki ki behan achi lagti hai aur Pinki ki behan ko Pappu pasand karti hai.

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Halan-k Pappu pehle hi Pinki ko chahta hai.
Ab jab-k Pinko ko Pappu acha nahin lagta aur
Pappu ka bhai Pinki k liye razi nahi hay aur
Pappu Pinki ki behan se pyar nahin karta jab
k Pinki ki behan ko Pappu ka bhai acha nahin lagta… 
To ye unka personal problem hay.

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Ek sharabi ne bahut zyada sharab pee le. 
Jab woh ghar aaya to uss ne jeb se chabi 
nikali aur tala ko kholney laga.

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Haath kaapne ke wajha se chabi kabhi 
idhar hat jati kabhi Udhar hat jati, ek 
admi pass se guzra toh sharabi ne usey
bataya ki tala nahi khul rahi hai.

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Uss shaks ne sharabi ke pass ja kar kaha,  
“lao chabi tala main khol deta hoon”
Aur phir sharabee ne kaha, “Tala toh main
hi kholonga bas tum makan ko pakar ke rakhna”

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FACEBOOK PAPER

Q1 . Define add as friend ?

Q2 . What does status means ?
 
Q3 . What do u mean by poke ?

Q4 . Give two reasons for liking the girls comments ?

Q5 . What is pic tag ?

Q6 . What is inbox msg ?

Q7 . Give details of info ?

Q8 . Draw a profile pic ?

Q9 . What is page ? And why we prmote it . Give reasons ?

Q10 . Define comments on post ?

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Cute N Short Love story!
Girl:hey i've got two words 2 say
Boy:wht?
Girl:I LOVE U
Boy:huh...isn't that 3 words!?
Girl:No! Coz (U) and (I) are one!

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In a bar, a man attend da call of a ringing mobile.
Man: Hello!
Wife: Darling shall I buy 1 diamond ring?
Man: Sure honey!
Wife: Shall I use your credit card for Crystal pendant?
Man: Ok dear!
Friends: Great to see that you love her so much!
Man: Hmm! By the way, whose mobile is this?!?

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Jb Koi Dost Apne Dost
k Liye Khulos Se Dua
Krta Hy
Tou Wo Dua Us k Dost k
Haq Me Baad Me Or
Pehle Us k Apne Haq Me
Qubool Hoti Hy !
ALLAH Karey Teri Shaadi
Ho Jaye

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Teacher Mehnat Karo Ga
Tou Kuch Bano Ga .

Pathan Student Teacher Hamra
Gadha Tou Itni Mehnat Karta Hai

Magr Wo Kuch Nahe Bana ...

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Breaking news
.
.
.
Latest news
.
.
.
Most important
.
.
.
Aham-Tareen
.
.
.
Taza-tareen
.
.
.
Dont worry. Ye sab to channel ki viewership
badhane k tareke hai

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Bush asks God:When will Iraq be mine?
God:Not in ur life time.bush cries.
Mushraf asks God:When will Kashmir be in Pakistan?
God:Not in ur life time.mushraf cries.
And i asked God:When will this reader get brain?
This time God says:Never in ur life time.

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Pakistani Courses:-

MBBS:-Master In Bomb Blasting Strategies

CAT:-Career In Alqaeda & Taliban

IIT:-Islamic Institute of Terrorism

JEE:-Jehadi Entrance Exam.

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CAT: how old ru?

ELEPHANT: 5 years

CAT: but u look big?

ELEPHANT: I'm a complan boy

CAT: I'm 30 yrs old.

ELEPHANT: 30? U LOOK SO
SMALL

CAT: I'm a "santoor girl", keep smiling.......!!

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ek don ka beta ORAL EXAM me fail ho gaya,
ghar aakar wo apne dad se bola-
sun baap , un logo ne 3 ghante tak apni 
puchhtaachh ki apun bhi terich aulaad hai, 
saala mooh kholaich nahi....

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What is the difference btw secretary
and personal secretary....
Secretary says: Good morning sir!
Personal Secretary Says: Oh MY GOD... 
its morning Sir....

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I love 3 things

1) pepsi

2) pizza

3) u
pepsi to drink

pizza to eat

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table kon saaf kre ga?????????

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Personality Test
select one of following
1-2-3-4-5
Result
if you selected
1:- you are monkey
2:- you are donkey
3:- you are fool
4:- you are Ullu
5:- you are stupid

what did you select?
ha ha ha

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EXAMS are like GIRLFRIENDS:

1. Too many questions.

2. Difficult to understand.

3. Too much explaination is needed.

4. Result is always Fail.

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It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return,

but what hurts more is to love someone,

and never find the courage to let them know how you feel.